Maxim #13:Taken as a whole, the Ten Commandments would be unconstitutional as laws in the United States of America and are demonstrably NOT the basis of American law and society.
Here’s one of the Marooned Astronaut’s favorite quotes from that supreme venal imbecile, Sarah Palin, uttered during her appearance back in May on Bill O’Reilly’s The O’reilly Factor: “Go back to what our founders and our founding documents meant– they’re quite clear– that we would create law based on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments, it’s quite simple.”
Here’s a theory on why Sarah Palin cut and ran from her job serving the people of Alaska as governor: she woke up one morning and realized she was grossly incompetent in the duties of that office. The above quote is a case in point.
In the United States of America, it is against the law to base any law on the God of the Bible and the Ten Commandments. This IS actually quite simple. And it shows that Sarah Palin is so impaired of reason that she should not be allowed to operate heavy machinery (such as a snowmobile); and certainly not handle a firearm.
Let’s not focus on the entire bible. You are busy and have things to do. Let’s just take the Ten Commandments as a telltale example. There are other sites that explain in depth how, as a whole, they are UnAmerican on principle. I’ll do a quick summation. But first, let’s refresh ourselves on the text of the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America:
“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” (Mmm. Every time a read it or hear it, it’s like my sense of justice and affection for humanity take a jacuzzi.)
Now, let’s take a look at those Ten Commandments, one at a time:
1. “I am the Lord thy god; thou shalt have no other god before me.”
A person may BELIEVE this and may SPEAK about it all they want. But it cannot be made the law of the land. It would establish a religion. The first commandment, as a law, is unconstitutional.
2. “Thou shalt not worship graven images.”
This can’t be a constitutional law as it blatantly reverses the “free exercise thereof” clause. If I want to worship a Campbell’s soup can, in America I am entitled to do so BY LAW. If I want to worship a god named GOD SUCKS!, I may do so freely. So, commandment number 2, as a law, is unconstitutional.
3. “Thou shalt not take the name of the lord in vain.”
God dammit! Jesus fucking Christ, sideways on a popsicle stick! What effing Yahweh motherfuckin’ Jehovah said THAT was supposed to be a law? None, as evidenced by the fact that the thought police are not kicking down my door right now. Commandment number 3, were it law, would be a blatant violation of the “freedom of speech” clause of the first amendment. The third commandment, as a law, is unconstitutional.
4. “Remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy.”
The fact that on both Saturday (the actual biblical Sabbath) and Sunday (the Sabbath as revised by Christians) I can go out and hire just about anybody to do any job I want (that is, if the Marooned Astronaut actually had any real money), including strippers (I have seen it done), shows that this is not actually the law of the land. The fact that it would constitute the establishment of a religion means that it can never be the law of the land until the Constitution is overturned and burned. The 4th commandment, as a law, is unconstitutional.
5. “Honor thy father and thy mother.”
This one’s a push. Technically, it is not illegal. But it is also sure no law in the United States of America. Let’s put a dash through the score box on #5: a 50/50 split.
6. “Thou shalt not commit murder.”
Well, nothing unconstitutional here. Murder (so far as I know) is illegal, without challenge, in the lower 48 plus Alaska, Hawaii and all the territories and protectorates. Yay! The Bible gets up on the scoreboard. You go, God. It’s your birthday! Its your… eesh. (Incidentally, the written injunction against murder predates the Mosaic “Big Ten.” It is found, among other places, in the code of Hammurabi in 1790 BC and in the code of Ur-Nammu in 2100 BC. The 10 Commandments are thought to originate no earlier than 1450 BC. As an unwritten law, I’d say it’s been considered a pretty good idea ever since two people lived near each other. Say, between 10,000 and 1,000,000 years before the Bible.)
7. “Thou shalt not commit adultery.”
While it once was Illegal in many states (just like harboring escaped slaves), it is no longer against the law. So, though it is not strictly unconstitutional, it does not appear in the foundation of law that holds up our society today. Just ask many of the politicians who love the Ten Commandments but who are also guilty of adultery and are not in jail.
8. "Thou shalt not steal."
Score one, God.
9. "Thou shalt not bear false witness."
BIG score here. Not because it’s more important than murder or stealing, but because it’s subtler, and a lesser god (say, Kthulhu or Baal or Satan) might have missed it.
10. "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s shit."
Okay. Forgetting that this is unenforceable, it is not strictly unconstitutional. However, it is decidedly UN-American. The United States of America is a consumerist, capitalist free market economy. It is predicated on consumers knowing what their neighbors have and wanting to possess those self same luxuries. The media universe which defines and bounds our modern society is utterly subsidized by advertising dollars, dollars spent to elicit one’s envy of his and her neighbor’s shit. If #10 were law and were enforceable, the day after it was ratified, every last trade group and industry in the nation would have their lobbyists in Washington working for its repeal, and the court cases would instantly pile high as the sky, based on a quite-valid claim of restraint of free trade. In any case, this commandment has no analog in the law of the land, nor in the constitution. It is the foundation of nothing in this country.
So, here’s the final score. From among the Ten Commandments:
3 are actual law.
1 is neither legal nor illegal (the father/mother thing).
2 are decidedly NOT law; and
4 are blatantly unconstitutional.
As a document, the Ten Commandments cannot be found in the foundation, or the roof, of our laws. Period.
The Ten Commandments are not the law of this land. They are not the “basis” for the law of this land. They are PROTECTED by the law of this land, and thank Satan (or whoever – the Marooned Astronaut really doesn’t get you guys and this whole religion thing) for that. Because you cannot make the Ten Commandments law without instituting a religion. And the moment the law against instituting a religion goes out the window, the law against the prohibition of the free exercise thereof goes with it.
The next time you’re watching the news and some politician remarks offhandedly that the Ten Commandments and/or the Bible (and we’ll have another post looking at just what’s unconstitutional about the rest of the Bible, were it law) is/are the basis for America’s system of law, tell everyone watching with you this is just demonstrably wrong. Even if you are watching by yourself.
Oh, yeah, and Sarah Palin? You’re a moron.
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